43 Losses There are 43 losses which can produce the range of emotions that we call Grief.   The long list includes: Death of a Loved One Divorce, or the End of a Relationship Loss of a Job Death of a Pet Loss of Health Major Financial Changes Retirement Moving Rape Abortion Miscarriage ~ and many others ~

Grief - the Definition Simply defined, grief is the normal and natural reaction to significant emotional loss of any kind.  While we never compare losses, any list would include death and divorce as obvious painful losses.  Our list also includes many others including retirement, moving, pet loss, as well as financial and health issues. The range of emotions associated with grief are as varied as there are people and personalities.  There is no list of feelings that would adequately describe one person's emotions, much less an entire society. Grief is individual and unique.  As every relationship is unique, so are the feelings and thoughts each person will have about the relationship that has been altered by death, divorce or any of the other 41 losses.

The Problem While grief is normal and natural, most of the information passed on within our society about dealing with grief is not normal, natural, or helpful.  Grief is the emotional response to loss, but most of the information we have learned about dealing with loss is intellectual. The majority of incorrect ideas about dealing with loss can be summed up in 6 myths which are so common that nearly everyone recognizes them.  Most people have never questioned whether or not they are valid.  Just looking at the myth that "time heals" creates the idea that a person just has to wait and they will feel better.  We have known people who have waited 10, 20, 30, and 40 years and still they don't feel better.  And, we know that they would tell you that not only had time not healed them, but that it had compounded the pain.  The other 5 myths carry equally unhelpful messages.

6 Myths Time Heals All Wounds Grieve Alone Be Strong Don't Feel Bad Replace the Loss Keep Busy